This weekend was not so good for me. I went by the ATM and noticed I had a -97.00$ balance. If the ATM could laugh it would, cry it would do that too but it did neither. The damn thing just sat there digitally flashing a sign asking if it could help me. Yes you electronic bastard, how about spotting me a couple hundred bucks.
The real news this weekend is the big argument that Mom and I got into over this whole Agency thing as she calls it. “You’re wasting your life with this Poe-leece crap son, can you not find a real job?” First of all, The Agency is as real as it gets. And second, I expect to be called “Chief”. I informed Mom that she, like everyone else would be expected to call me “Chief” and that I couldn’t show her any favoritism. She stopped for a second or two and then this:
That display got mom a 2.5 second flashlight in the eye attitude adjustment. She told me if I kept putting that damn light in her eyes she was going to slap the stupid out of me. Well if The Agency takes off like I think it will, I will be moving out soon anyway I said. “Honey, you will be thirty years old next week, and you are still living at home, you should have been out of here years ago.” I just haven’t found what I’m good at yet until now! The Agency is going to be my big break.
She held her hand up and began to rattle off the things I have failed at:
1) Paper route
2) lemonade stand
3) dog walker
4) Wal-Mart door greeter
And she went on but I stopped listening at 5. Mom lived under the delusion that I would become some lawyer or CEO or something, but I did better. I became a police chief!
I have a feeling that something good is going to come for me. Mom let me use her credit card to order a couple things online. I got a badge and a siren to put on Squad 1. In the end, Mom agreed to give me three weeks to get The Agency up and running and then I’d go find a “real job”
The Agency Files 